my body is a machine that turns black coffee and cream cheese into mediocre labor
the dinosaurs actually had gameboy advances but you won’t see a fossil of one because they were made of cartilage
The thing about Peggy hill is you see her in some episodes and you might think well this woman has some lesbionic mannerisms. but the truth is she's just one of those very sporty southern moms who inexplicably gets away with not upholding their side of the gender roles even in communities where everyone is kinda expected to do that. Like she kinda gets to do what she wants. Cause she's Peggy that's just how Peggy is. And she has a husband and a kid so they're like ok fine I guess
Like if you told her she looked gay here she would laugh really awkwardly and be like Well, I hope you mean that as in "happy", because in that case I am positively gay. I am so gay and in love with my wonderful husband Hank. And Hank would be like *texan sigh* Peggy, You can't go around tellin people you're "gay" for me. People are gonna start to get the wrong idea. And then shed accuse Hank of being homophobic and double down
"dont smoke around your pets" okay well i dont even smoke im asthmatic. my dog smokes bc she needs to fucking chill sometimes and Yeah i light them for her Obviously bc she cant use a lighter. i dont get anyrhing out of this arrangment and i resent the implication. in fact shes giving ME secondhand smoke. so my question is why are you so hateful and jugemental and acting like an asshole to me making presumptions and shit about my life.
text from my dad (2021) - my dad
“i’ll admit that my main problem with this is that i haven’t asked”
submitted by @cornandcoconutsoup
Original text for context
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